Truly Rich Tips for Moms: On Extended Breastfeeding (a perfectly normal thing to do!)

"Welcome to the Milk Mama Diaries Carnival (November). For this month, we focus on extended breastfeeding. Participants will share their experiences and tips on breastfeeding their child/ren beyond 12 months. Please scroll down to the end of the post and check out the other carnival participants."


*Warning! I will be talking a lot about breastfeeding and some things related to it (including terms that have the word "nipple" in them, so if you don't want to read anything of the sort, pls. stop now. However, if you want to learn more about my extended breastfeeding journey, go ahead. ;-) But don't say I didn't warn you! (And if you're a mom you may want to read the tips I'll be sharing at the end of the post. Thanks! Beauty, brains and breastfeeding are a winning combination, and I believe every woman has these gifts!)


I often get these remarks when people find out that I am still breastfeeding Rysse, who is now 2 years and 4 months old:

Rysse is such a big girl already! ;-)

"Wow, buti ka pa. Malakas gatas mo! (Wow, you're lucky. Your milk supply is good!)"
"Really, you're still breastfeeding her? Shouldn't she be on formula already?"
"I can't breastfeed for that long - I work fulltime kasi eh." (I can't breastfeed for that long - because I work fulltime.")
"Doesn't it hurt because she has teeth already?"


And so on. Of course, there are some people who are very encouraging and tell me that I am doing a good thing practicing extended breastfeeding. (Thank You Lord for these supportive people, especially my family!) I only wish there were more people, especially moms, who would give nursing into toddlerhood a chance - for starters, by looking into the benefits it has for BOTH mother and child.


My eldest, Tim, was also breastfed beyond 2 yrs. I was still breastfeeding him at least 2x a day when I found out I was pregnant with Rysse. I was already experiencing some nipple soreness at that time, and didn't realize that it was because I was already expecting. 


After doing some online research I discovered tandem nursing, and really wanted to do it, but extreme nipple pain whenever Tim nursed caused me to change my mind - I was getting very irritable, sometimes to the point of snapping at him (yes, I AM a Monster Mama at times!) or dreading nursing time. Since I believe breastfeeding is supposed to be a beautiful, nurturing experience for both baby and mother, I felt that it was time to wean Tim. 

Tim at 2 yrs and 4 months ;-) 

We did all sorts of things in the weaning process - read loads of books to distract him from nursing (didn't work much); put stuff that tasted yucky to him on his "dede" like vitamins which he disliked, etc (I know, this was a bad thing to do!); let his Papa rock him to sleep while I was in another room, etc etc. I don't remember anymore what exactly worked, but we were able to wean Tim successfully when he was 2 yrs and 3 months old.

That's us when Rysse was a newborn. Time flies by quickly, doesn't it?

Do I wish that he had breastfed longer?


Yes! 


Sometimes I even wish he was still nursing now, even if he IS already 5! ;-)


(I realize now though that even if he is not nursing directly anymore, he can still benefit from my milk if I add it to the milk he drinks now.) 


So how was / am I able to breastfeed beyond 2 years? Here are a few tips, based on my experience and research:


1. Educate yourself. Just like beginning breastfeeding, extended breastfeeding is something you need to learn more about in order to be able to do it with conviction. Do your research. Kellymom and La Leche League International are good websites to begin with. There are LOTS more helpful sites though. Remember, Google is our "best friend!" (something I was reminded by when I attended a seminar by Jomar Hilario recently). 

Image from chwnicufamilies.org

Once you are knowledgeable about breastfeeding, including extended breastfeeding, you will begin to see that it is not only the best for babies, but is actually the most normal thing for moms to do!


2. Find support. When I think about it, if I had been part of a breastfeeding support group or network like L.A.T.C.H., Medela Moms, Babymama and the like when I was struggling with nipple pain while pregnant with Rysse and nursing Tim, I probably would have been able to be more convicted to try tandem nursing. 

Photo from examiner.com

Since we were still based in Timor at that time, it was really hard for me. Although I did, and still do, have the best support from my husband and other family members, it would still have been nice to learn from the experiences of other moms. It is also helpful essential that you get a pediatrician (and ob-gyne) who are breastfeeding-friendly, or breastfeeding advocates even.


3. Teach your toddler "nursing manners." Since we taught our kids baby signs from 6 months onwards, breastfeeding became a whole lot easier for us because we knew when Tim, and later on, Rysse, would want to nurse (the sign for "milk" is so easy - just open and close your fist as if milking a cow! More tips on teaching your baby to sign in my article on Smart Parenting's website here). 

Image from babysignlanguage.com

When they were older and more verbal, they used the Filipino word "dede." When they became toddlers, we made sure that they knew proper "nursing manners" - like no biting, twiddling, helping Mama stay covered when nursing in public by not wiggling around so much, etc. (We taught this to them earlier though, even before they turned 1).


4. Set your breastfeeding goals. Like everything else in life, it would help if you had goals for your breastfeeding journey. Some women plan to breastfeed for only 6 months but end up doing it for much longer (this is HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!); some plan to do it beyond 2 years but circumstances dictate them to stop at 1 year. Whatever the case may be, having a goal will help you weather tough days and plan more purposefully for the weaning process (unless you decide to let your child self-wean). 


As for yours truly, my goal is to let Rysse nurse for as long as possible. Should I get pregnant in the process, I hope and pray that I will be able to try out tandem nursing. Of course, I leave everything in God's hands.


5. Pray. Yes, prayer IS power! I don't think I would have survived (and THRIVED!) these 5 years (though there was a 6 month interval) of breastfeeding (and motherhood in general) if not for the grace of God and the intercession of Mama Mary. Prayer was one of my greatest "tools" in my breastfeeding journey. Of course, knowing that Mama Mary was a breastfeeding mom helped too!

Mama Mary gave Jesus "liquid gold"

So there you have it. Just a few of my lessons and tips about extended breastfeeding. I hope you'll take the time to read my other breastfeeding-related entries here. I also wrote a few articles on Smart Parenting's website which may be helpful to you:
How To Breastfeed Your Baby in Public
Gift Ideas for Breastfeeding Moms
Breastfeeding Against All Odds
Review of Mommy Matters
Review of Mommy Treats

Of course, don't miss out on the other entries to this month's Milk Mama Diaries Carnival below:
J and the Three Boys - No more "de-de"

My Mommyology - My Extended Breastfeeding Experience
Mommyluscious - Breastfeeding for Two Beyond Two
Truly Rich Mom - On Extended Breastfeeding (a perfectly normal thing to do)
Life of a Babywearing and Breastfeeding Mommy - Still breastfeeding after 2 years
Got To Believe - Breastfeeding Room Story

Apples and Dumplings - My Constant Challenge with Extending Breastfeeding

Mommy Kuwentos - Challenges and Rewards of Extended Breastfeeding

The Odyssey of Dinna - Nurturing Rafael: Extended Breastfeeding, Stretching Some More Lovin'

Legally Mom - Breastfeeding Beyond 1 Year: Barriers and Issues

Homeschooling Mommy - Yes, I've Got Milk

SOlovelyN - As long as he wants, I can
Touring Kitty - Extended Breastfeeding is Possible
SassyBiatcheMom's World - 1.4 and still breastfeeding

Mec as Mom - Shooting for the Benefits, Extending the Love
Chronicles of a Nursing Mom - Barriers/Myths vs. Extended Breastfeeding

Logo from L.A.T.C.H.